The Jealous Are Trouble to Others, but a Tormet to Themselves.

Jealousy is something I deal with a lot more than I should. The thing about jealousy is that it eats at every good thought that you have and turns it into something evil and ugly. It grabs you in by that one thought that you hate but is in someway addicting and so curious that you think about it more and more often until it escalates and turns into an idea that is almost permanently etched into your mind. 
Sometimes the jealousy can be so bad that you lose the ones you love over it. And of course you hate the jealousy for this, for all of it, those terrible, heart-aching thoughts it gives you and you want to scream at the jealousy until it finally leaves you alone.
Then it gets to a point where the jealousy isn’t even under your control any longer, you just become jealousy itself and everything to be envious of, you are and it’s painful, it’s sickening and the cruel irony of all of it? You’re jealous of those who never seem to be jealous. 

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The Only Advice I Can Give

You’re hurting and I hate to see it. But, it’s all a part of growing up and growing strong. 
It would be easy for me to say that over time you’ll feel a lot better and that it won’t be that hard, which in a way I guess is true, but I should be more specific, what I really should say is this; 
Right now you are young and there will be plenty more experiences of grief and pain in your lifetime.  When you’re going through these you should remember that as time goes on, the pain doesn’t exactly disappear – you’ve simply learnt how to handle and cope with it all – you’ve become a lot stronger than before. So next time you feel like giving up, that you have been defeated by it all just think about how far you have already come, it would be a waste to admit defeat after all that.  You are strong and will only get stronger and stronger as you and I both grow up. It’s not always going to be easy but there will also be times of pure joy and gloria and that is the only advice I can give.